I recently read a book about George Bush and a statement made by Barbara Bush moved me. The reason they have had such a good relationship is that they are both willing to go 75%. Like them or not, is this is true, and I believe it is, it is an inspiration and it is rather quite uncommon.
We are used to hearing that relationships should be 50/50. That in itself would be progress since I have noticed that our perception is that most of us feel that we give more than we receive. This perception and the times when it is true make up a worthy toxin.
In the best-case scenario we would all feel that we are receiving enough emotional support from those that we need it from to fill our requirements. If that sounded too “business like”, it was intentional since I want to make it clear that these relationships extend to our business life as well as personal.
Often we are not in the same league as the Bush family in this area of life. We feel slighted and then we decide that we will get our revenge by holding back. The result is higher levels of toxins in everyone involved.
My good buddy, Daniel, provided me with some great insight just this week.
Typically I take Daniel for a good walk each day since he thrives on a lot of activity and exercise. Last week it was really cold and after less than half of what we normally do, I turned towards home because the cold had really gotten to me. Daniel came inside but he was not at all upset. As is his habit, he wagged his tail in approval and went on with his day. Even though his expectations were not met, he remained satisfied.
Are we capable of the same attitude? I think that if we are to make solid progress on this toxin of expectations, we need to make a stride towards Daniel’s way of thinking.
Is it because the person we seek attention from is not giving us what we need or have our expectations risen too high?
In most cases, the answer is a blend of the two. However, the action necessary is under our own control.
Like Daniel, we should often defer to keeping our expectations in check, remaining appreciative as possible with what we do receive.
The other fact to consider is that if we look carefully at the Bush family we may be thinking about 75% of a gallon of water, when in reality it is 75% of a quart. What does the person really have to give?
I have been making real strides with this toxin in the past couple of weeks and will continue to do so. How about you?