A Journey to Knock Out Toxins 4

By January 29, 2015Uncategorized
A Journey to Knock Out Toxins 4

The day begins with a phone call where all you hear are negative issues about what is wrong with the world. It continues with an e-mail that describes how messed up the person’s life is even though much is brought on by her!

This is the world of the toxin of other people’s toxins. They can seep right from them into you and before you know it, you are so filled with their toxins that you are drained of energy.

The reason that this toxin can be very dangerous is that like most, you do not see it coming until it is too late. You have good intent in mind but then you notice that you have no energy. It can then put you in a place where you start complaining about things that are not really legitimate, or ones that you do not have control over.

I am willing to bet that this sounds familiar to all of you! It is important to clarify that I am not saying that you should try to be there for those in need. As a matter of fact, I do that quite often in my life. What I am suggesting is that you need to really focus on that fine line where you can go from trying to help to making yourself sick with toxins.

My Rommel suffered with Cushing’s disease and it really started to make him sick in his last three months. During this time I was with Rommel as much as possible and it came clear to me that he was the model for this necessary balance on both sides!

Rommel would seek comfort from his toxic disease but he never crossed the line to making me feel like I was responsible for his illness. He appreciated every second we were together and had a perfect balance. During the same time I was in a frantic state as Daniel was in a heated campaign to win the Hero Dog competition. The toxin of stress was taking its toll on me and Rommel had always been my comforter. Here, too, he was so balanced. He cuddled near me and even jumped up so I could hold him when he noticed that I was in a stressed state. However, he had his own issues to deal with so after a few minutes he would retreat to his pillow to rest.

Rommel and I, during this time, provided a great testimonial for the balance necessary for the toxins of other’s toxins.

We all have some toxins we are trying to knock out at any given time. At the same time we need to be there for others to help them with their toxins. Then comes the most important balance. If a person has a piece of food in their teeth you can easily help them to remove it. If it is something you cannot really help with like an illness or their continued actions based on being simply silly or having a constant bad attitude, then the best way to proceed is to do the best you can up to a point. Then when you feel that toxin invading your mind, it is time to stop and politely but firmly move on.

I cannot tell you that I have knocked out this toxin completely, but I can say that I have made some positive strides to do so. Like many toxins, it has a way of sticking around for a while. Also, like many toxins, it is a journey and the first step is to clearly recognize it and become more aware of its presence.

I do hope that you have now taken a positive step in the same direction.

Please share your thoughts with us.


  • Laura says:

    This one really hits home for me Joe! I had a very good friend that created so much negative energy within her marriage and friendships. Her concerns were very real in her mind but she obsessed over insignificant things and was such a downer to be around. I tried to be there for her for many years but she totally lost it one day blaming me for something that someone else said and that I had absolutely no control over so from that point on I picked myself up, dusted myself off and moved on. That toxin went on for way too long and I was exhausted. Thanks for this blog Joe! Hugs to the fur kids 🙂

    • Joe says:

      Dear Laura,

      Thank you for sharing your experience. As the saying goes, this is a “fine line” we walk. It takes a careful focus but it is extremely important to keep the toxin level in check!

      Peace, Joe

  • Natasha says:

    Thanks Joe. Your points are well explained. Dogs are fantastic models of this. In our training experience we see dogs who may not have been trained to stop the toxins, for example a dog who is reinforced by using aggression for results whether it be for a toy/territory, to be left alone or for attention. And then there are other dogs who will submit over and over again to the toxic people or dogs until it’s spirit appears to be broken. Finding a balance is important for all living creatures. Thanks for the example of Rommel and yourself. It’s a great reminder that helping is good, but ultimately knowing when it’s okay to politely walk away is important.

    • Joe says:

      Hello Natasha,

      Thank you for your comment and insight on canine behaviors. In spite of some of their challenges, they still have so much to teach us about life. It is true what you said that balance is very important.

      Peace, Joe

  • Hi Joe, I really had no idea a dog could get Cushing’s Disease. I really enjoy your posts, they make a lot of sense to me. They sound so much like the words of wisdom from the Buddha and H. H. the Dalai Lama! I have been following their teachings for over 15 years now. What you say really works for me.

    • Joe says:

      Hello Molly,

      Thank you for your comment and kind words. Yes, I did not know they could get Cushings either but unfortunately they can. Rommel fought hard and gave so much love his entire life.
      I also like the teachings of the Buddha and Dalai Lama, but if there are similarities to my entries it is a “good accident” on my part!
      I simply try to learn good lessons from dogs and lief experiences.

      Peace, Joe

  • Colleen says:

    Agreed – other people’s negativity, etc, can drain you. I woke up one day with the “a-ha” moment and decided to do something to change it. It changed my life for the better in the long run, but initially turned it upside down. It turns out that “moment” was the best thing that ever happened to me. You can only take the negativity for so long!

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